The Bar Mitzvah of the Century!

A Carousel of 14 Photographs from Brian's party

Saturday, December 17, 1995

Beverly Hills, CA

So what would you do if you are a major Hollywood player married to an ex actress? You've sired one and only one son and love him fiercely with a passion that embraces devotion, pride and yes, a hint of vanity.

Your "sonny boy" turns thirteen and his faith calls for a lofty ceremony recognizing this considerable milestone. So what do you do? With an abundance of ingenuity you conjure a magical evening which shall dazzle and be cherished by all. You throw "The Bar Mitzvah of the Century!...also known tonight as "The Brian Awards."

My cousin Peter Roth and his lovely wife Andrea tossed one of the truly great soirees in Beverly Hills to celebrate their son Brian's very special day. Peter is now President of Fox Television and is responsible for such American TV hit shows as Picket Fences, Chicago Hope, Space and The X-Files, to name a few. In fact some of my favorite Hollywood actors turned up tonight like Tom Skerritt and writer/producer Stephen J Cannell. The only no-show was Michelle Pfeiffer (her husband works with Peter) who was elsewhere filmimg on location...drat!

During dinner we were surprised by a most unusual movie. The week prior to this gala, Peter, Andrea and Brian had filmed several Hollywood send-offs. i.e. The Godfather (The Roth Father) and The Silence of the "Roths." Brian was also interviewed by a perfect Joan Rivers mimic in a limo. Additionally, when we entered the main ballroom we were assaulted by paparazzi and Talk Show "News people." All this footage was then miraculously edited and duly unveiled on a super screen even before the main course was served.

All this extravagance prompted Andrea's dad Harold Rattner to tell this wonderful anecdote. "A family of means, in an effort to throw the event of all events flew their entire Bar Mitzvah party over to Africa and placed them all on a herd Safari elephants to traipse over to the banquet to end all banquets. In the midst of this trek the elephants suddenly stopped dead in their tracks and the guest who was sitting on the last elephant called out 'What's holding up the line?' From a great distance way up the line another guest bellowed back 'It's the Bar Mitzvah up in front of us.' "


I must thank Dr. Robert Saffa (my cousin Joan Saffa's hubby) for his support and contributions to this page. I now quote the good Doctor...

Date: Sat, 23 Dec 1995 23:19:54 -0800
Subject: oops!

"Been followin' The Page - cool BUT, Robert!
man you betta correct de spellin of da names
da big honchos you showin!!
To wit:
Michelle Pfeiffer (not Ph..)
Stephen J Cannell (not Chanel)
Tom Skerritt (2 t's)
Honest, I checked them out ..
with Joan and by researching the very Net itself.
These people would NOT be amused to see their names misspelled.
and it's too cool a page otherwise to be so besmirched.
And we know, thousands, nay millions are watching
each & every pixel evolve ..
Brian's marks into history ..
Love it .. it's faaabulousss baby!

What about including Brian's e-mail box
for greetings from the great Net itself?
Is it legal? Is it kosher? Is it kool, or not?
It would blow him away, you must admit.
Anyway, his tag is:

Cheers as always, your partner in crime -
the OtherBob, Bob ~/..

My response to "bosaf"...I *know* I'm gonna regret this but I dood it... the Email deed. Ha!

* Sooooo...want to blow Brian away? Why not send him some E-mail. Just click

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